Speachless

I've been trying to express my feeling in the shadow of the stupid situation i've been put in lately , I just couldn't .
I don't remember a time i felt that bad in my life , that whenever i remember what , and who i'm seemingly losing, i swear i can hear a tear screaming up there =( .

The thing is , this salfa doesn't want to end , and its upsides and downs r like that thing elly fel theme parks elly goes up and down till ppl throw up " i have no idea what its called and don't know if my eew explanation fulfilled ur imagination or not =p"

Today for example , started up rough but it's now so calm , but i know calmness won't solve this problem . This problem need a serious discussion sit , so everyone can rid away any hard feeling they're keeping for them selves.

Friendship is built upon trust , honesty and willing to express ur self to each other without any fear . If any of those were missing , the Friend Ship will sink so easily.

I wish things return to the same again , but i don't want this to happen by keeping our feeling inside and not confessing what really bother us about each other .

Allah ys'hl

P.S , i swear i'm good ppl ha =P

Fixing others , Damaging my self

I'm , mlgoofa
I can't c something happening wrong in front of my eyes and not interfere to fix it , especially if it involves my friends.
Lately , many stuff was happening to and from my friends , which were , as i judge , wrong !
I couldn't just stand and watch them harming their selves , and others !
So , as i always do , interfered .
I wish i didn't
I may lose a very dear friend , and lose my credibility with many others .

I just wish i didn't .
If fixing others will harm me , I guess i have to stop !
Saying that is so much easier than actually doing it , but please god help me to do it.
I can't stand any more sad days ....

Cutting the fun out of my life

I love math
always did , always will
I use math in every aspect of my life , one of those , are time management . which i'm very bad at =p ( not mathematicaly , only practically =p)
so the day is consisted of 24 horus
i have 10 hours for sleeping , which ends me with 14 hours ,, lets say 6 in the university , that leaves me with .. yeah good ppl .. 8 hours .. 4 of them is for fun , and 4 for ,,presumably studying =o

I'm on line every day of my life .. that...usually doesn't take place in the 4 hours of fun ( being on line is fun but not that fun =p) so usually , it takes time from my sleeping , which gradually reduces to 3-5 hours a day...

I love to stay in the uni ,( 6 hours r for dwam,,and if i have business there) , the staying in the uni for nothing,,is usually taken from , yeah u guessed it =p, the studying ours =o =o

That's what i call time management,, =) .. smart girl mn jd =p
After realizing last week that i really really need to study,,coz 3adi 3adi mrrh that i get my 1st F if i didn't , and after seeing this week problem =o , and after deciding with my group that we have to finish this long problem in one week, and after being a part of Pre Med Introduction Week (after stuff wajd =p ), the sleeping hours(which i can't cut from them), the studying hours(can't cut from them to), the staying at the uni hours(business wajd!), weren't enough for me to finish this problem + not to neglect Future Doctors
so , i had to cut the fun out of schedule for this week and add it to the "studying hours" .

=( , yeah me z3lana shwy , but we can't have it all ,can we .

New Attitude

After having really bad days , within the happy period of al 3eid =s , I finally today had the courage to adapt a new attitude.

I Bought A Skater =D =D =D and i'm so happy that i finally did

It makes me feel like i'm flying away from all my mental problems.

what a happy feeling brought by a little (but very heavy =p) something=D

Sorting My Priorities

I remember I began to write this post last weekend , but i didn't finish it . coz i realized i was only promising my self to sort my priorities , but didn't care to put that promise at the top of "The Priorities List" !
Last year , i put my studying 2nd,,and sometimes 3rd to wajd stuff . y3ni i remember , asking to have a short objective coz i have an activity at that week. Not thinking ,that it's suppose to be the other way around , i should cut from my responsibilities in that activity ,, coz i'm having a big objective or big problem !

One of my friends said
1-My Studying
2-Future Doctors

Me, my studying is the bottom of my priorities , even priority don't seem a good word to describe its place.
So , this year , I've got many responsibilities ,even more than last years ,,regarding FD and other stuff . But , I promised my self (and I've started acting on the base of that promise since yesterday) that , no matter how the job took time that time won't be taking from Me , it would be taking from my free time .
So , My Studying and most importantly My Self ,, is at the top of the list .


**My Priority = To make that last more than a day =D .

5rboooosha

سنين

وأنا بدون ذكراك

سنين وانت عن بالي

بعيد

من زود ما قررت انساك

هجرت شعري والقصيد

تخطيتك

بس ما تخطيت غياب الخواطر

ما تخطيت متنفسي .. من زماني الغابر

ما تخطيت ذاك الشعور

لما اعبر عن كل حس ..معتملني

قصيدي الماهر

في اخفاء احاسيسي السرية

ومشاعر

في الافصاح عنها ما ارغب

الحنين ..خلاني ارجع اكتب

بس ما ظنيت .. بعد هالسنين

الاسم الي كان بين السطور

يصرخ يجاهر..ويثور

وهو اول كلمة تنكتب

يا رب اخفي المستور

=P

Shock MalAbsorption

U know when u feel negative vibes in the air !
Today , i got shocked in so many ppl that i can not count.
Ppl in different stories , the negativity have been vibrating along the day , that i heard all these stories in the very short hours of today !

I just don't get it ! what's so important in life that makes ppl lie , fight and destroy every meaning of a friendship . Nothing yswa to lose ur best friend , or lie on a potential friend just to be "cool" .

I'm just malabsorbing those shocks today , i hope i get the right enzyme to digest them soon =s

Lesson of the day = Don't trust anyone , No one is permanent

allah y3ein el jmee3 =(